We met on Hinge. He told me I was special. He forgot to mention his live-in girlfriend.

I (25F) met a guy (26M) on Hinge in April. He was really charming. Romantic, attentive, emotionally open. He said he wanted something serious, and I thought maybe I’d finally found someone who meant it.

He told me about his last relationship—said it lasted three years, but they broke up because she “wasn’t the one.” He said they were still cool, just friends now. She used to live with him, but it wasn’t like that anymore.

At one point I noticed someone else’s YouTube account was still logged in on his TV. He admitted it was hers, but repeated the same story. He made it sound harmless. I didn’t push.

We weren’t casual. We saw each other often. I met his friends. There were some flaky moments, but overall he made it feel real. And I believed it.

Then a few days ago, my friend sent me a video from a woman’s story— she was showing off a ring, saying it was from him for Valentine’s Day.

It was her. The “ex.”

I messaged her. Turns out they’ve been together the entire time. She lives with him. She didn’t know about me, and I didn’t know about her.

Apparently his friends knew enough, but no one ever said anything. When I confronted him, he didn’t admit it or apologize. He just said we should take space. And that was it.

I’ve blocked him. I’ve told her. I know I dodged something bigger in the long run, but right now it just sucks. I feel stupid. Embarrassed. Hurt. Mostly I just feel confused about how it’s possible to be so close to someone and have none of it be real.

I know the answer is time, but— how do I get over someone who never actually existed? Has anyone else been through something like this and come out okay?